Monday, January 23, 2012

Embarrassing Mommy Moments

Any woman who thinks she will go through her journey as a mother with out being completely embarrassed by her children at some point in time is nuts. Kids don't mean to do it. It just happens. I can remember doing stupid things to my parents when I was a kid. One time, my mom was shopping and my little sister was sitting in the seat of the shopping cart. I some how managed to jump on the bar between the wheels on the bottom of the cart and flip the cart over... sister and all. My poor sister had a rug burn on her forehead where she slid, face first across the carpeting in the store. I don't remember that part. All I remember is being on the floor on my back, with the cart on top of me, staring into the faces of a bunch of adults that were wearing concerned looks (but not helping... go figure...). My mom had to be mortified. She still took us out to the movies though.

I have three children, ages 3 1/2, 2 and 7 months. I've already had my fair share of embarrassing moments but I know that there will be many more.

Two of my most memorable happened at McDonalds. My 2 year old son decided to climb to the top of the playground and sit. Squat. Not come down. However you want to put it. He stayed up there for 2 hours. I could NOT get him to come down. Because we live in a sick and scary world, I was too afraid to ask some one to watch the baby and my purse while I went up to get him. Any time I called his name, he would scream "NO" down to me. I could see him sitting at the top of the slide. At first, I thought that he was too afraid to go down. Then I realized he just thought it would be funny to make me mad. Eventually, EVERYONE, including the other children, in the play place was calling his name. I tried to get my 3 year old daughter to push him down the slide. I love the kid but she's a little clueless sometimes. If my mom had given me permission to push my sister down the slide as a kid, I'd have jumped at the chance. My daughter though, climbs to the top and says, "Mommy says it would be nice for you to come down now." Geez kid. Like he didn't know that already... I almost started crying because I just couldn't get him to budge, in spite of the other McDonalds patrons calling his name. Finally, after being completely mortified in front of strangers for hours, a little old lady came over to me and promised to sit with the baby if I wanted to run up there and get him. Let's just say that his face upon seeing his angry mom turn the corner of those stupid tube alleys was priceless. He knew he was in trouble. I don't think I've ever seen his eyes get so big.

The other time was with my daughter. They had had to accompany me to my OB appointment earlier in the day. While there, my daughter, who LOVES to talk, decided to introduce herself and her little brother to everyone we walked past. After the appointment, I took them to McDonalds, making a potty break before ordering our food. While in the stall, I was talking to my daughter about how she shouldn't talk to strangers. This is something I'd been trying to teach her for a while. I proceeded to ask her what she's supposed to say when a stranger comes up to her or tries to touch her. She then, in the bathroom of McDonalds, starts screaming, "STRANGER DANGER!!!!" over and over again. Very loudly. Have you ever stood outside a public bathroom while some one inside was yelling? It amplifies the sound. I wanted to leave right then and there but figured that alone would have seemed even more suspicious. Hopefully, we'll never have to do THAT again.

I asked some of my facebook friends to share some of their most embarrassing moments as mothers. Here are some of their responses:

"One of many embarrassing moments was when Marissa was little and I was trying to loose weight. We were at the grocery store, walking through the bakery section and Marissa ran over to the bakery case and yelled, 'Don't look, Mom. You are on a diet!'"

"When Josh was about 4 or 5, he went to stay with his uncle who taught him lots of useful information. After he came home, we were at the clinic for an appointment and the doctor said something about spinach. Josh said, "Yeah, spinach puts lead in your pencil!'"

"I was at the grocery store with my 2 youngest and while waiting at the check out, they're looking at the magazine rack. One cover had a younger Michael Jackson featured and VERY loudly, you hear, "I thought Michael Jackson was white!" At that moment, they were not my kids."

"Breastfeeding for the first time in public, at a Panera, sat by a window with my back to every one else in the restaurant. I ignorantly used a pretty silk blanket as a cover up, so when silky blanket slipped off me, no one in the restaurant saw my gigantic breast, but every one in the parking lot sure did!"

"The first time Gaige saw a black person, he was 3. It's Oregon. He asked me if he turned that color from too much chocolate milk. The guy laughed.... Gaige also told everyone in the public bathroom that I was pooping one time."

"When Nathan was three and Evan a baby, we walked from the car dealership to McDonalds for a snack as our car got an oil change. Nathan acted up and I had to take him into the bathroom for a 'reminder' on how to behave. When we got back to Nissan, a lady sees his McDonalds cup and asks, 'What did you get at McDonalds?' His response? 'I got a spanking.'"

"What's really still embarrassing to this day is the time that I took my kids, who were one and three at the time, for a walk around our neighborhood/apartment community. When it was time to head back to our apartment, my Noelle was so adamant that we were not going home that I physically could not get her and my son down the sidewalk. I tried carrying them both, I tried threats, I tried bribes... I could not get them to budge. And in fact, Noelle was beginning to try bolting in the street. I was desperate! I called my husband on the cell but he couldn't come home from work right then. So finally, a good Samaritan driving by stopped to see if I needed help. She ended up carrying one child while I carried the other. Finally, we managed to get them locked uptight with in the apartment again."

It's times like these that help us mothers grow thick skin. Times like these embarrassing mommy moments are what give us the strength to face more difficult trials or just flat out remind us that we're human. I have heard that my kids will pay me back for all the stuff that I did to my own parents when I was a kid. That honestly really terrifies me. None of my own experiences as a mother so far come anywhere close to what I put my parents through so I know that there will be many more embarrassing moments. Should be fun...

I love hearing these kinds of stories so please feel free to share your own embarrassing mommy moment. Also, if you're a fellow blogging mom, please go ahead and click on the "Mommy Moments" button and link up! Looking forward to hearing some of your own personal "mommy moments"!

1 comment:

  1. Abby this is awesome! I would link up but I haven't written about any of my embarrassing moments in a blog post (yet!).

    The one recent moment that comes to mind is that somehow my girls picked up this saying..."ewww, he's creepy!" I don't know where they got it from but for a few days straight they would say it about everyone they saw. Thankfully it was always in the car or when they were far enough away that nobody heard their comments. My husband and I kept telling them it was not okay to say that and they needed to stop. Well, wouldn't you know it one day I was with my youngest(2 1/2) standing in line at the grocery store check out. A man walked up behind me as I unloaded my groceries onto the belt for the checker. My daughter started to eyeball the man quietly. Then out of nowhere she looked at me and in her loudest voice, she said "mommy, that man (pointing at him) is reaaaallly creepy!" I was horrified. Thankfully he was a good sport and chuckled a bit. I apologized profusely and I'm pretty sure in the car on the way home I had some very choice mommy words for her. That was the last of that least so far...


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