Tuesday, November 15, 2011

I'M a Real Housewife!

I'm going to embarrass myself here. I'm going to tell you what my secret  indulgence is. I hope my dad never reads this post because he'll tease me so bad because it's such an empty headed bubble gum guilty little pleasure. Ok. Here goes nothing.

I'm am obsessed with the Real Housewives shows on Bravo TV. I use the word "obsessed" loosely though. It wouldn't kill me if I had to stop watching and I'd never try to meet these women. I like to watch and I do DVR all the episodes of all the different "locations".

When I first started watching, I was totally flabbergasted that they would even make a show about housewives. But there's shows about EVERYTHING these days. I mean, come on, Storage Wars (which I'm not making fun of because I really like that one too but still...), Lady Hoggers, Hoarders (I can't watch that one because just the idea of it is really sad to me) or Fashion Hunters? I mean. Really. We are a bizarre society. Myself included. Back then though, I just didn't see the point in filming a bunch of housewives. What's to film? Changing diapers? Doing laundry? Loading and unloading the dishwasher? Picking up dog poop or taking the kid to soccer practice? Hmm... I quickly realized though that these women are not typical housewives. Shoot. Half of them aren't even wives!

I know. I know. The name of the show is more a play on words, a gimmick. And I know I watch it, all of it, but the title still bugs me. I can only think of a couple of women on the show that's an actual housewife. At least not in the way that it really means. These women, if they're even married thus earning the title of "wife", are, with the exception of a couple, are career women. They have oodles of money and don't do any of the normal "housewife" duties. They are able to hire some one to do it for them. I'm not going to lie, if I was making oodles of money, or my husband, I'd hire help in a heart beat. Are you kidding me? My house isn't gigantic but its not small by any means either. I have a hard time keeping up with it. Not to mention all the extra stuff I'd like to be doing with and for my kids, the errands I wish I had help running or the lawn care or the cooking or the accounting. You name it, I'd hire some one to do it for me if I had the money so that I could pursue other things. Like a career or charity work or continuing my education or any number of other things. These "Real Housewives" are anything but. And I'm not knocking them. They're, for the most part, seriously, not all of them, successful, hardworking, driven women. I actually respect a few of them. The rest of them though, make me gasp and frown and shake my head.

This got me to thinking, if a major TV network can call a group of women "housewives" who are very obviously NOT, then what really is the definition of "housewife"? I googled it. According to Google, a housewife is "a married woman whose main occupation is caring for her family, managing household affairs, and doing housework." Ok. Spot on. That's exactly what I thought. I asked people on my facebook page what they thought defined a woman as a housewife. I got some interesting answers. Every one had a different response and not all felt the same way about the housewife. I was more impacted though by the feelings between the generations. The younger women felt that the word "housewife" was like being put in a box. The older generations either understood the simplicity AND intricacy of the meaning and didn't seem to mind the term. I once had a man tell me that I wasn't a housewife or a home maker. I was a Domestic Engineer. I thought it was cute and it bore with it a sense of pride. The word "housewife" though, doesn't really bother me. But I feel that, being a mom, I'm a little more than just a housewife, I'm a stay-at-home-mom (quite an upgrade... stated sarcastically).

Long story short, here's how I feel. I'M A REAL HOUSEWIFE! I do not work outside of my home. I work IN and FOR my home. I take care of my husband and all his needs. I take care of my children and all their needs. I take care of my dogs and all their needs. I clean my home (or try to). I do the cooking and the shopping and the organizing, the laundry, the dishes, the socializing. I'm not trying to tally up all the things I do to try to make my role in the home stand out more. I am blessed to be a housewife because my husband goes out and works his butt off. He works long, hard hours with people that he may not always get along with doing work that is physically, mentally and emotionally draining. He gave up his own comfort so that the kids and I are able to enjoy being comfortable. He's a good man. And I am his housewife. Which I think brings him a sense of pride as well. Any way. I'm the woman of the home who stays in our house working on anything and everything under the sun that has to do with our home and family.

Bravo TV can keep their loosely coined term and I will continue to watch as I fold 5 baskets of laundry after I've put all three of my kids to sleep. I know its a silly show and these women are all over the top but I'm hooked. However, I will enjoy knowing that I am more of a housewife than they are (not downplaying the fact that at one point in time, unless their husbands were crazy rich when they married them... or they're not even married... that they at one point in time may have been in my shoes).

This Wannabe Supermom is a NOT a wannabe in the housewife department. And I'm proud of that.


  1. Abby, Dad is sitting next to me as I read this....I won't tell your secret. Be proud of being a Stay-at-home Mom, Housewife, Domestic Engineer or whatever term they give it today. I am proud of the woman you've become, you endure some tough times with a smile on your face, you look beautiful all the time and you amaze me with how well you take care of your family. (remember me when I'm old ok, I want you to do crafts with me). Just shoot for the stars....Proverbs 31 Woman.

  2. Real housewives unite! I'm a at home mommy and I love it. No rush hour, not having to put on make up or curl my hair every single freaking day. I shop during the day now, I can go to the doctors in the mornings, I can be with my kids when they're sick. Oh yeah...real housewives of reality rock. Those fake ones on Bravo? Well, they are sort of fun to watch :)

    Thanks for stopping by my blog :)

  3. Like the words of Micheal Jackson, " you are not alone", I LOVE anything with a Housewive attached to it! Bravo is probably one of the most watched stations in my house, all things fashion, though I am not as talented, lol. I fantasize about my filming of being a featured Housewife, but.... I'm not that interesting;)


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