Tuesday, August 2, 2011

A Wannabe Supermom

No one ever tells you just how hard being a mom is. Or a wife. Or any of the other million things I have become since tying the knot. I'm not saying that my life is more difficult than a single woman's but the responsibilites are totally different. Every Monday through Friday, I role out of bed between 6 and 6:30. I change my 1 month old daughter's first diaper of the day. Then I go down the hall and get my 3 year old daughter and my 1 1/2 year old son from their rooms and we all head down stairs. Then its more diaper changing, sippy cup filling and scrambling to get them all fed while letting all 3 of my dogs out for a potty break. Then its time to clean. And no matter how hard I try, the cleaning never ends. From sun up till well after sundown, I am cleaning up every one elses poop. Litterally.

One may argue that I've brought this upon myself. I didn't have to get pregnant almost immediately after getting married. I didn't have to get pregnant again nine months later. And I didn't have to get pregnant yet again a year after that. I also didn't have to agree to getting a third dog, let alone keeping the other two. I could try to go get a job out of the house. But with my lack of qualifications and the price of childcare these days (not to mention the fear of leaving my kids with a potential freak), it makes no sense for me to escape for 8 or more hours a day in an attempt to earn a paycheck. I made a lot of choices through out my life that led me here with out me even knowing that this would be the outcome.

No one ever tells you the extent of the rewards though either. I have an amazing husband. If he knew I was saying that on here, for the world to see, he'd have a heart attack. I try not to tell him how I feel too often since I know it'll go straight to his head. His ego is already huge.

Just kidding...

I try to tell him often how much I appreciate and admire him. There are times when I wouldn't mind locking him in the closet or taping his mouth shut but more often than not I am blown away by his genuine love for me and our children. To be loved by the person that you love is an wonderful gift. To have your own feelings mirrored in some one elses actions and words toward yourself is incredible. He is my best friend. I wouldn't have the reward of all his affection if I wasn't married to him.

Also, as much as I dislike changing diapers or emptying dirty training potties (that some one neglected to tell you they filled hours before), I can't imagine my life with out the little people that subjected me "to a life of servitude". I never realized how much I was missing until my children were born. When my first daughter was born, I cried hystericly when they placed her on my chest after she came out. I think it scared the doctor and nurses a little but I was overcome with emotion (and hormones) when I first laid eyes on the beautiful baby that is now my little girl.

A week after my son was born, he almost died from a fever that the cause of which was never figured out. He spent a week on life support in the ICU and almost another week in recovery from that in another ward of the hospital. We couldn't touch him. I couldn't feed him. With breathing tubes in his mouth and being constantly sedated, I didn't hear him cry for almost two weeks. It was nerve wracking. I was a mess. The whole situation taught me how precious life can be and how quickly we take it for granted. He is completely healthy today and is constantly keeping me on my toes. I will forever appreciate him for teaching me such a valuable lesson.

My third child was born just over a month ago. She is an angel. We were so nervous when she was born due to what we all went through after the birth of our son. I think she's going to be the prankster of the family. She has this mischivous little sparkle in her eye. Already, it feels like she's been a part of our family forever. I don't know what we'd do with out her.

Having and taking care of a family 24/7 is hard. Its the hardest thing I've ever had to do. There's so much involved. From the cleaning to the childcare to the dog sitting to the cooking to the teaching to the organizing... No job or education I've ever had prepared me for this. I'm not perfect by any means. I wish I was supermom. I see friends of mine doing things with their kids or showing off their spotless houses or walking their obedient dogs and I get jealous. Sometimes I break down and cry. I wish I could be more like them. And I'm determined to be so. I think this blog will be a record of sorts of my journey to becoming Supermom. I'm a healthy, smart, creative, willing woman and there's no reason why I can't become one. Shoot, some of the other "supermoms" I know don't fit most of that criteria.

So I'm going to suit up and devise a master plan to "save the day". UP UP AND AWAY!!!!

1 comment:

  1. Trust me there is no reason to be jealous of any other woman. Nothing is perfect and it's not easy raising children or having a family. If anyone tells you it is they are LYING!! The grass seems to be greener but there other things that are not so perfect. Don't you ever look at them and get jealous again. You are already a supermom by just wanting to be better.


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